Dream
It’s an overused cliché but I really don’t know where to begin. I can sense my emotions swirling around in my head but as time passes, they become diluted, confused with the past and an unknown future.
I spent too much of Christmas Eve in the hospital consoled only with the echo of a tiny heartbeat contentedly pulsating, oblivious to an outside world. I try to pull together my feelings but choose to let them slide through my fingers knowing that some questions are best unanswered. Or, perhaps enjoying the view of a glorious distant horizon while not wanting to fixate on the ground needed to be traveled.
We spent a relaxing and happy Christmas at my mothers and I managed to squeeze in a few runs, the more enjoyable of which led me atop Maple Mountain alone with Matt, four inches of snow and a set of very outsized cougar tracks.
After having accompanied Ally to another doctor’s visit, I now quietly sit back in Victoria wondering how to be emotionally strong when the mere question causes my eyes to brim with drops of fear. Ally is 25 weeks pregnant and tonight I’m praying she’ll make 28.
Unfortunately, it doesn’t look like I’ll be racing the Phoenix Marathon in January as my attention and energy over the next three weeks will be better spent here.
Training:
Sunday: day off (scheduled, swapped with Monday)
Monday: day off (unscheduled)
Tuesday: mountain run, 1:06:17
Wednesday: easy 1:08:42
Thursday: day off (unscheduled)